Sometimes you should be afraid - of yourself

I knew I was in trouble. We were supposed to go to youth group and then to Sunday evening worship. We decided since I had the car and none of our parents were going to church that night, we could go downtown and cruise Polk Street where the airmen from Amarillo Air Force Base hung out on the corners. Somehow someone noticed. Daddy heard. He was standing at the front door when I got home. Something in his voice and the way he watched me as I walked from the car to the door told me he knew.

“Where have you been?”

How could I cut my losses? “We took Elizabeth home.” Not a complete lie. We did take her home after we went cruising. And I didn’t call, and we weren’t at the church. And I did not just tell the truth.

Daddy just held out his hand for my key.

Why do we cover ourselves with little white lies, not quite the whole truth, when we know we have done wrong, and the lie just compounds wrong doing? I knew from experience that telling the truth always mitigated punishment. I knew honesty often left just consequences, which were bad enough. 

Would I have kept my keys instead of having to call my friends and tell them I couldn’t drive to school or to the football game Friday night? Could I have still gone to the game? Maybe, maybe not. But I was scared. And my lie just made things worse. 

While certainly not like eating of the tree of good and evil, or lying to the omniscient God, my fear was real. Palpable. Overpowering. I knew.

“I was afraid because I was naked,” Adam said. No, he was afraid because he was caught. Only one rule. Temptation. Just say “NO” I want to yell at Eve. Then at Adam. Just tell God the truth!

⁹ But the Lord God called to Adam, and said to him, “Where are you?” ¹⁰ He said, “I heard the sound of You [walking] in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.”¹¹ God said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten [fruit] from the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” (Genesis 3:9-11 AMP)

It seems easier to make excuses instead of saying I caved under peer pressure. Still, the car and the choice was mine. This is a healthy fear. It should prompt right decisions, like the truth. It seems so simple. Righteousness is always rewarded. The truth will always out. And yet. . .

³² And you will know the truth [regarding salvation], and the truth will set you free [from the penalty of sin].” (John 8:32 AMP)

³ For [civil] authorities are not a source of fear for [people of] good behavior, but for [those who do] evil. Do you want to be unafraid of authority? Do what is good and you will receive approval and commendation. ⁴ For he is God’s servant to you for good. But if you do wrong, [you should] be afraid; for he does not carry the [executioner’s] sword for nothing. He is God’s servant, an avenger who brings punishment on the wrongdoer. ⁵ Therefore one must be subject [to civil authorities], not only to escape the punishment [that comes with wrongdoing], but also as a matter of principle [knowing what is right before God]. (Romans 13:3-5 AMP)

Sometimes you should be afraid. Not of God, but of yourself.

Genesis 21:17 Do not be afraid, God has heard

     So Abraham rose early in the morning, and took bread and a skin of water, and gave it to Hagar, putting it on her shoulder, along with the child, and sent her away. And she departed and wandered about in the wilderness of Beersheba.

The Repudiation of Hagar

Steen, Jan Havicksz. (1626-1679). Painter

Around 1655/57

Dresden Gallery, Old Masters, Germany

     When the water in the skin was gone, she cast the child under one of the bushes. Then she went and sat down opposite him a good way off, about the distance of a bowshot; for she said: “Do not let me look on the death of the child.” And as she sat opposite him, she lifted up her voice and wept.

     And God heard the voice of the boy; and the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven, and said to her, “What troubles you, Hagar? Do not be afraid; for God has heard the voice of the boy where he is. Come, lift up the boy and hold him fast with your hands, for I will make a great nation of him.”

    Then God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water. She went, and filled the skin with water, and gave the boy a drink.                                                  Genesis 21:14-19 NRSV

     

     The story of Hagar and Ishmael can be found in Genesis 15-21, with a brief interruption for the story of Sodom and Gomorrah in parts of chapters 18 and 19.

     The first time she leaves Abraham’s and Sarah’s tents, pregnant Hagar felt compelled to flee. She left without permission or notice, an act forbidden by law. The angel of God found her, and in the act of justice sent her back to be submissive to a bitter and jealous mistress. God does send a soothing promise for her wounded spirit. Ishmael might not be the Child of Promise as Isaac will be, yet he would be the child of a promise made to her. She names the well Beth-laharoi: the well of Him that lives and sees me.

     For fourteen years Hagar and her son live with all the tension and bitterness Sarah’s impatience brought about. Then after Isaac’s birth Hagar and Ishmael begin to manifest their jealousy. When Ishmael begins to maltreat Isaac, Sarah has Abraham ostracize, repudiate, and expel Hagar and her son to certain death in a barren wilderness with only as much water and bread as she could carry. Hagar’s extremity becomes God’s opportunity. Abraham gave her a bottle, God gives her a well.

adapted from “Hagar” in All the Women of the Bible 

by Herbert Lockyer.  

     The life and experiences of Hagar teach us:

• ·         The temptations incidental to a new position;
• ·         The foolishness of hasty action in times of trial and difficulty;
• ·         The care exercised over the lonely by the all-seeing God;
• ·         The Divine purpose in the life of everyone not matter how obscure or friendless;
• ·         How God works out His gracious purposes by seemingly harsh, but just, methods;
• ·         And the strength, comfort, and encouragement that accompanies the hardest experiences of               His children.

adapted from “Hagar and Ishmael” in The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia 

by Dr. James Chrichton. 

Recall a time in your life when you felt invisible to the world. Abandoned. Alone. Isolated. 

In the comment section below, share what happened that caused you to know you had not escaped God’s notice. 

Tell how God saw you – right where you were. 

How did you experience God’s freedom and grace, instead of the justice you deserved?

O For A Thousand Tongues

Psalm 56

Uploaded on Sep 23, 2008

Tears are a Language God Understands
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  Psalm 57

Celtic Hymn Jesus Lover of My Soul ABERYSTWYTH Text: Charles Wesley, Tune: Joseph Parry

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  Psalm 58 Genevan Psalter - setting by Claude Goudimel

Published on Dec 31, 2012

Geneva 1562

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ernst stolz recorders & organ

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John Wesley said, "Assurance means a state of mind and heart, not so much dreamy as durable. A sense of absolute trust in God does not lift us above the fray but guides us through the fray with confidence that someone holds us by counting our sleepless nights and gathering our tears. Our palpable fear of persecution is woven with the irrepressable hope of deliverance. The faithful are not immune to dread, we cannot always know we will be safe. What we know is that come what may, we will be saved."

Be assured, children of God, no matter how deep your suffering, no matter how high the evil one seems to have risen above you, you will be redeemed. 

Paul is worried about the Galatians. He hurts for them and for us. Paul desperately wants us to  be born anew, to be set free from the bondage of the Law. He wants  us to sing the song of Christ.

Keith & Kristyn Getty "In Christ Alone"

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Keith and Kristyn Getty perform on The Harvest Show

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Jesus set out and went away. Jesus hid. Jesus could not escape. Jesus sighed. Jesus looked up to heaven. Jesus responded. Jesus puts his finger into our ears. Jesus touches your tongue. You must respond in faith. You must look up into heaven. You must understand. What was broken is healed. You are set free.

O For A Thousand Tongues To Sing - Mike Rayson

Uploaded on Dec 31, 2008

A new version of Charles Wesley's classic Hymn. Taken from the Mike Rayson album "Even So:1" - featuring Tommy Emmanuel. For more information about this album and other's, please go to www.myspace.com/mikerayson

Monday, February 4, 2013

Old Testament (Hebrew Bible) Psalms: (Morning) 56 Denunciation of Godlessness, 57 Praise and Assurance under Persecution, 58 Prayer for Vengeance; (Evening) 64. Prayer for Protection from Enemies, 65 Thanksgiving for Earth’s Bounty

Old Testament (Hebrew Bible) The Prophets: Isaiah 51:17-23 Blessings in Store for God’s People

New Testament (Christian Bible) Epistle: Galatians 4:1-11The Purpose of the Law; Paul Reproves the Galatians

New Testament (Christian Bible) Gospel: Mark 7:24-37 The Syrophoenician Woman; Jesus Cures a Deaf Man

These Daily Scripture Readings Epiphany (January 6) and Ordinary Time until Lent, (March 8, 2013) are adapted from The Book of Common Prayer, Daily Readings for Year One. http://www.crivoice.org/epiphany1.html

My personal study bible for this Liturgical Year is The Wesley Study Bible, New Revised Standard Version, Abingdon Press, 2009

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Righteousness

There is value, great value, in living according to God’s law. Happy are those who avoid unrighteous behavior. The effect of the righteous life is one's unwavering commitment to God’s word. To be “righteous” is to have a “healthy relationship” with God, to live wisely.

To live righteously, is to live a decent life, that is reputable, moralistic, noble, principled, right-minded, and virtuous. To live righteously, is to live a good life that is virtuous, exemplary, guiltless, inculpable, innocent, irreproachable, and pure. Righteousness is doing that which is just, acting rightly or justly; conforming to the standard of the divine or the moral law; to be just and upright, free from sin.  When one lives righteously, one lives a life without prejudice; characterize by evenness.

I remember. when we did a “hunger weekend” with the youth group. On Friday night,  we went without supper and spent the night carrying everything we brought with us in large garbage bags. We moved from place to place in the church and read aloud the prophets, the psalms, and the gospels. The next morning we went to the local grocery store and gathered a box of vegetables left by the dumpster. I remember the turned up noses, the “eeww’s,” the “I’m not eating THAT.” We cleaned and cut off moldy places and soft parts and put them all in a pot with water to simmer. That was breakfast.

We went to a soup kitchen in a nearby town to help serve lunch. The smell of unwashed bodies was offensive. When a mother, in apparent drug withdrawal, brought her four- or five- year-old son through the  food line, one could see the righteous indignation on the faces of the youth group. We went back to the church fellowship hall.  We compared what we had seen and felt to the scriptures we had read. We talked about their outraged sense of justice, decency and fair play, their sense of righteous indignation.

Trusting God in different ways came out of that indignation. All of them have mentioned that weekend to us at one time or another. For some,  it helped God call them into ministry as pastors and social workers, but for all, it changed the way they viewed others.

Every day  is an opportunity to trust God in different ways. In the midst of daily life,one can increase  trust in God, confidently and faithfully, knowing one's life is enfolded in God’s attention and love.

God is a God of power, wisdom and authority, John Wesley saw over an over the spirit of bondage transformed to the spirit of adoption as we awaken to our sin. God does not force conversion on us. We must seek adoption. However it is only God who can complete the transformation.

It is God who, hearing one's cries and caring for all like a good parent, now infuses life with “heavenly healing light.” Hearts are strangely warmed, so one's consciousness is dominated no longer by sin and law, but by God’s capacity to love, heal and make new.

We have the experience of most adopted children: once we feel abandoned to the powers and principalities, but now we can count on the kindness and support of a loving parent. Once we were bound to fear, but now we are marked with the holiness and happiness of the family of God

The “good news” is the proclamation of God’s kingdom, manifested in the ministry, death, and resurrection of Jesus. “Repentance” is not just a feeling of regret, but an ordering of one’s life as to be acceptable to God. Jesus himself receives baptism by John, joining this group of people who have ritually dedicated themselves to righteousness; to true religion.

We must not substitute rituals for Christ-centered faith. Instead, we should enter into  a life of rigorous discipline of study prayer and good works. True religion is a matter of the heart and is characterized by Spirit-inspired joy, holiness, and peace. To John Wesley, these were the irrefutable marks of the kingdom of God.

I encourage you to choose a short passage of scripture that stops or strangely warms your heart. Meditate on those words. Write them on a card and keep them  with you. Write them, with soap, on your mirror. To meditate on God’s word literally means to mumble or utter it under the breath.

Romanian Orthodox Chant - Psalm 1,2,3 at Putna Monastery

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www.sfantulioanrusul.ro Psalm 1,2,3 at Putna Monastery, Romania 

God's Righteous Servant. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.defendproclaimthefaith.org/gods_righteous_servant.htm

 "An outline of a Bible-school curriculum". (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.archive.org/stream/outlineofbiblesc00peas/outlineofbiblesc00peas_djvu.txt

Reflecting on Our Faith - UMC.org, http://www.umc.org/site/c.lwL4KnN1LtH/b.2310045/k.4A66/Reflecting_on_Our_Faith.htm

(accessed January 14, 2013

Kim Hill - Psalm 1 Uploaded on Apr 30, 2007 Call to worship based on Psalm 1 Visit us at www.phillycgc.org

“righteous.” equitable." Webster's Third New International Dictionary, Unabridged. Merriam-Webster, 2002. http://unabridged.merriam-webster.com (14 Jan. 2013).

Monday, January 14, 2013

Psalm 1, 2, 3, 4, 7

Isaiah 40:12-23

Ephesians 1:1-14

Mark 1:1-13

Daily Readings from The Voice, the internet web site of CRI/Voice, Christian Resource Institute, a global and ecumenical ministry dedicated to providing biblical and theological resources for growing Christians. www.crivoice.org Readings based on the Revised Lectionary of the Book of Common Prayer.

The Wesley Study Bible, New Revised Standard Version, Nashville: Abingdon Press, 2009. 

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Make Me Teachable

Tuesday, November 27, 2012 

Daily Readings, Year 2 Revised Common Lectionary

Psalms of ASCENT: 120, 121, 122, 123, 124 125, 126

Zechariah (THE PROPHET OF THE LONG VISION) 11:4-17

1 Corinthians 3:10-23

Luke 18: 15-30

Dear God, it is cold outside. Even if, I managed to put on enough clothes, it will not change the temperature. Let me cocoon myself in the stillness of a childlike spirit.

Remind me to sing as my feet trudge, but my heart runs up the mountain toward the quietness of your presence and protection. Help me twirl with outstretched arms as you raise me out of the broken snare that is my body, into your high and holy city of absolute freedom.

 Turn my supply of useless emptiness into tears of overflowing joy, according to your promises. Jesus, touch me with your cleansing, quieting, illuminating, reassuring and liberating hands. Help me find that place of humility and understanding necessary to seeing, hearing and feeling your arms of mercy.

Make me responsive and teachable, so that in being weighed and measured, I may be found understanding, forgiving, peaceable, considerate, submissive, and merciful. For those are the ways I want to be; even when it is hardest to be among others.

 I know that I am not only expected to learn, but to educate as your collaborator, even if I never say a word. Let others see only you. May my spirit be only a window through which others see beyond me to you. Amen.